Ok, here goes

So, I'm struggling right now. I'm having a super hard time getting focused, staying within my points and exercising consistently. When I wrote that short little 'more coming' post, things were going really well. But for the last little while, they haven't been. I'm constantly feeling discouraged and incapable. I am terrible with negative self-talk, and I've convinced myself that I can't do this. That I have too far to go, and that it's just not going to happen. Ugh.

I decided to stop going to WW and stop weighing myself. I was becoming obsessed with how much farther along I should be in this journey, and making all decisions based on the scale. If I was going to have a bad day, it was out of control. Good day, extreme perfect. I wasn't even being really honest on the blog I don't think b/c it's embarrassing---I started this blog to share my journey with others, and in my head that looked like me rapidly losing weight and succeeding. It's not looking the way I want it to, so I want to stop. And I know I can't (stop). I know I probably won't (stop). That I'm going to keep going and eventually all this weight will be gone....but right now, I just suck. And I wish I didn't have to write it, and I wish it wasn't happening. I probably won't post for awhile b/c I need to figure some stuff out.

Thanks so much for reading and encouraging me, it really does mean a lot. If I start blogging again, I'll let you know:)